Cultivating Community

Verse to Remember:

We understand what love is when we realize that Christ gave his life for us. That means we must give our lives for other believers. - 1 John 3:16 (GWT)

If you are a member of a small group or class, I urge you to make a group covenant that includes the nine characteristics of biblical fellowship: We will share our true feelings (authenticity), encourage each other (maturity), support each other (sympathy), forgive each other (mercy), speak the truth in love (honesty), admit our weaknesses (humility), respect our differences (courtesy), not gossip (confidentiality), and make group a priority (frequency).

When you look at the list of characteristics, it is obvious why genuine fellowship is so rare. It means giving up our self-centeredness and independence in order to become interdependent. But the benefits of sharing life together far outweigh the cost, and it prepares us for heaven.

Experiencing Life Together

Verse to Remember:

Share each other's troubles and problems, and in this way obey the law of Christ. - Galatians 6:2 (NLT)

God intends for us to experience life together. The Bible calls this shared experience fellowship. Today, however, the word has lost most of its biblical meaning. "Fellowship" now usually refers to casual conversation, socializing, food, and fun. The question, "Where do you fellowship?" means "Where do you attend church?" "Stay after for fellowship" usually means "Wait for refreshments."

Real fellowship is so much more than just showing up at services. It is experiencing life together. It includes unselfish loving, honest sharing, practical serving, sacrificial giving, sympathetic comforting, and all the other "one another" commands found in the New Testament.

A Place to Belong

Verse to Remember:

In Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. - Romans 12:5 (NIV)

A church family identifies you as a genuine believer. I can't claim to be following Christ if I'm not committed to any specific group of disciples. Jesus said,"Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples" (John 13:35 NLT).

When we come together in love as a church family from different backgrounds, race, and social status, it is a powerful witness to the world. You are not the Body of Christ on your own. You need others to express that. Together, not separated, we are his Body.

What Matters Most

Verse to Remember:

The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself." - Galatians 5:14 (LB)

Love should be your top priority, primary objective, and greatest ambition. Love is not a good part of your life; it's the most important part. The Bible says, "Let love be your greatest aim" (1 Corinthians 14:1a LB).

It's not enough to say, "One of the things I want in life is to be loving", as if it's in your top ten list. Relationship must have priority in your life above everything else. Why? Life without love is really worthless.

Formed for God's Family

Verse to Remember:

See how very much our heavenly Father loves us, for he allows us to be called his children, and we really are! - 1 John 3:1 (NLT)

God wants a family, and he created you to be part of it. This is God's second purpose for your life, which he planned before you were born. The entire Bible is the story of God building a family who will love him, honor him, and reign with him forever. It says,"His unchanging plan has always been to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. And this gave him great pleasure" (Ephesians 1:5 NLT)

When God Seems Distant

Verse to Remember:

For God had said,"I will never leave you; I will never abandon you." - Hebrews 13:5 (TEV)

The deepest level of worship is praising God in spite of pain, thanking God during a trial, trusting him when tempted, surrendering while suffering, and loving him when he seems distant.

Worship That Pleases God

Verse to Remember:

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. - Mark 12:30 (NIV)

God is pleased when our worship is authentic. When Jesus said you must "worship in spirit", he wasn't referring to the Holy Spirit, but to your spirit. Made in God's image, you are a spirit that resides in a body, and God designed your spirit to communicate with him. Worship is your spirit responding to God's Spirit.

When Jesus said,"Love God with all your heart and soul" he meant that worship must be genuine and heartfelt. It is not just a matter of saying the right words; you must mean what you say. Heartless praise is not praise at all! It is worthless, an insult to God

Developing Your Friendship with God

Verse to Remember:

Draw close to God, and God will draw close to you. - James 4:8 (NLT)

In the Bible, the friends of God were honest about their feelings, often complaining, second-guessing, accusing, and arguing with their Creator. God, however, didn't seem to be bothered by this frankness; in fact, he encouraged it.

Every time you trust God's wisdom and do whatever he says, even when you don't understand it, you deepen your friendship with God. We don't normally think of obedience as a characteristic of friendship; that's reserved for relationship with a parent or the boss or a superior officer, not a friend. However, Jesus made it clear that obedience is a condition of intimacy with God. He said, "You are my friends if you do what I command" (John 15:14 NIV).

The truth is--you are as close to God as you chose to be. Intimate friendship with God is a choice, not an accident. You must intentionally seek it. Do you really want it--more than anything? What is it worth to you? Is it worth giving up other things? Is it worth the effort of developing the habits and skills required?

Becoming Best Friends with God

Verse to Remember:

Friendship with God is reserved for those who reverence him. - Pslam 25:14a (LB)

You will never grow a close relationship with God by just attending church once a week or even having a daily quiet time. Friendship with God is built by sharing all your life experiences with him.

Of course, it is important to establish the habit of a daily devotional time with God, but he wants more than an appointment in your schedule. He wants to be included in every activity, every conversation, every problem, and even every thought. You can carry on a continuous, open-minded conversation with him throughout your day, talking with him about whatever you are doing or thinking at that moment.